Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Last Updated: 01.07.2025 04:46

Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

What can I do after 18 cops raided my home, without a warrant, seeking a person who didn't live there and wasn't there, and also went through all of my stuff? The person wasn't on the lease, and they didn't see him enter.

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Can both male and female cows be milked? Can bulls also be milked?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

What's your take on Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? How has it affected you?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I can count

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Can you fly an American flag in the UK in your own private property there? What is the UK’s government stance on that? And if yes, do you also have to fly the UK flag or the American flag can fly solo?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

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authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

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Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

How is TikTok able to censor porn?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand how hurricane paths work

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It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know who the president of Turkey really is

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

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I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

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I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

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I can read

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

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I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for traitorism

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I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

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I actually pay taxes

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have a reading level above third grade

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?